Stop taking too long to reply to the text. You are blocking your friendship

Depending on who you ask, texting is either an easy way to stay in touch or an overwhelming item on the growing to-do list. What’s convenient for one person can be a burden on another, which can cause tension in some relationships.

So, how long can you go without someone texting you before they end up in a friendship chopping block? If you ask me, it won’t be that long.

It may be tough, but I believe healthy relationships are maintained through timely communication. If you can’t worry about someone responding to your message within a reasonable window, it will be virtually impossible to adjust the hangouts, share life updates, or call you if that’s how they like chatting.

A friend takes a few days to reply – if so – becomes indifferent and uninterested, especially when you don’t arrange alternative ways to catch up. You may wonder how much they actually value your time and effort and why they don’t prioritize communication with you. Repeated crimes can make it attractive to throw in towels and invest your energy elsewhere.

How long can I go without texting someone?

Here I will first acknowledge my personal bias. I always enjoy texting. It’s been my favorite way of communication since I got my first phone at 13 and discovered the magic of talking to friends anytime, anywhere.

It’s no coincidence that some of my closest friends tend to be people who regularly text me. There is a sense of familiarity that comes from sharing your daily experiences and thoughts. It’s also a fun way to engage in jokes and share relevant memes and videos.

And before I get upset anyone – if I’m not yet, I’ll once again admit that texting is not fun for some people. But I believe that if you want to maintain those relationships, whether it’s a text, phone call, or face-to-face meetup, you have the responsibility to communicate clearly and frequently with your loved ones.

So, what is the acceptable window of time for someone to return to you and text you?

I may not be as whimsical as I am with that Frank’s introduction, but I like to give people a chance. If it takes days for someone to reply to me for the first time, or simply not come back to me, I’ll let it go. But if it happens again, it’s a strike. I think you should always text someone within 24 hours – despite special circumstances such as travel or illness.

Taking a repetitive response several days is not only uncompassionate, but it only kills the atmosphere. I laughed at the meme I sent to you five days ago, why do I care? At that point, I don’t even remember what I reached out to you. And if I’m asking you about going to an event and you only respond after it’s finished, it releases completely other levels of annoying.

I think the time and effort investing in friendships will include replying to the text within a reasonable period of time (unless your friend is attacking your inbox, of course). If someone takes a few days to respond continuously, I will stop filming it as my signature and put that energy into a friend who doesn’t wait for me.

A more personal way to stay in touch

As teenagers, my friend and I texted each other around the clock, sending us a steady stream of messages and photos about everything. (Being young and unemployed made all this simple.)

But as we got older and busy, and social media began to eat our free time, text messages were largely replaced by posting and consuming content on platforms like Facebook and Instagram. Our digital activities were not personal, they did not help us perform better and maintain relationships. Relationships tend to be fractured as social media gives the false impression of catching up with someone without actually talking to them.

Most people have witnessed the awkwardness of someone not responding to your text for days, but they post constantly on social media. Time and energy enter both activities and choose to bypass personal interactions for something more public, making you unable to feel a genuine connection with people who care to reach out to you. Taking 30 seconds to reply to a text can be the difference between building meaningful relationships and breaking them.

While phone calls and face-to-face meetups are undoubtedly the best way to have a close conversation with someone, given that our lives have become more and more busy, finding time to work can be a challenge for both parties. Texting is a relatively low-lift way to build a true sense of friendship and connection.

So next time you think it’s not a big deal to read or stream someone, you might rethink what your actions (or lack of it) convey.